Registered: Jan 2003
Location: Horny, hellbound and happy in the Harem with Meryl Marie
Posts: 308

Heatwaves, hurricanes.. sounds like the weather is having a frenzy!

Mel - oh yes, I know about the tattoos. Brave Haremites. I don't even have pierced ears.

The Very Secret Diary of Teutsie, continued.

Day 10.
Hair update: dark as um.. a raven. Snogs: at least one an hour. Am irresistible sex god!

Keeping having Hoot flashbacks. V. amusing. Bet HALFling is still finding caramel sauce in odd places.

Day 11.
Got an email from HALFling. He is thinking of growing a beard. Seems to have forgotten he is a) a doll and b) a hobbit. Fool of a Took/Brandybuck/Baggins.

Day 12.
Another email from HALFling. He wants to dye his hair blond. Have not laughed so much since Schatzie fell in the bathtub whilst trying to apply gel to his eyelashes. HALFling so obsessed with personal grooming.

What have I done with my foot-hair conditioner? What? What?

Day 13.
Have given up on brown contact lenses idea. Are more important things in life, like um, finding inner peace. Am v. nice saintly hobbit doll.

Day 14.
All right, who’s put a crease in my cape? Honestly.

HALFling still fussing with hair idea. Don’t know why he bothers. Hewene will kill him if he tries anything.

Day 15.
Got saucy postcard from Elevensies. Will never drink again. Didn’t know it was possible to do those things. Blimey.

Day 16.
Got saucy postcard from Spork. Eek. Apparently “voulez-vous couchez avec moi ce soir” does not mean “I would like some cheese with that”. Explains a lot.

She invited me to Paris. V. nice of her. Presume Paris is a suburb in Utah.

Day 17.
Got saucy postcard from someone named Rainbow Brite. Suspect HALFling has put my name, photo and address on the Net, e.g. the Dolls Do Dallas site. Argh. Arrrgh.

Day 18.
HALFling is no longer considering blond tresses, dammit. Would have been a riot. Perhaps can talk him into sideburns.

Have put HALFling’s pic up on the Pouty Porcelain Princes site. Go me!

__________________
It's official - Peachy is definitely some new genetically engineered lifeform. ~ Ghyste.

Peachyness is a wonderful thing. ~ Arryle.

The soul of The Two Towers is in Frodo's anguished face. - Russell Swensen, LA Weekly.

O! Gil-Galad was a poncy king
Of him the jesters madly sing
The last whose realm had vodka free
Between the mountains and the sea... - Jussacgirl, LOTR Big Brother.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Sep 2002
Location: Tall in the saddle
Posts: 432

quote:

---

Originally posted by Peachy
Got saucy postcard from someone named Rainbow Brite.

---

Nah. The tracking scene is totally credible. Tracking is a skill you can learn, like knitting or anything else. Even I can follow a critter trail through the duff, and see where the lil guy made his bed. Not well, not like a hunter or a Numenorean, but I'm learning. It's fun! And it's wicked good for impressing the boyfriend.

I got spam-mail this morning from sam@total-and-complete-support. He's gone pro.

__________________
People are not ultra-fanatical about Frodo.
--Elijah Wood

Less death! More bosoms!
--Ghyste

Walk to Rivendell = 13/458 miles

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Mar 2003
Location: pounding on my keyboard
Posts: 113

quote:

---

from Niphredil
a crescendo in both spirit and sense which transcends anything so paltry as oestrogen overload, causing seratonin fountains to burst through the pain from the sheer bittersweet beauty of the tale.

---

LOL! I have never heard the end of LOTR described better. Love the hard-to-swallow event redeemed-by-angst list. Feel free to enumerate any other contenders. (Let it be said here that I love Tolkien's work no end, in its complete entirety, just as it stands. But discussing it is too much fun to pass up.)

quote:

---

from Peachy
HALFling still fussing with hair idea. Hewene will kill him if he tries anything.

---

*snork!* Love the "kill him" phrase being stood on its head (hair, whatever). Peachy, will you please PM me the URL for the Pouty Porcelain Princes site? I'm sure such a thing would not be PG-13 -- not with this crowd.

Cion -- your Sam spam!

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Sep 2002
Location: Looking out to sea
Posts: 953

Pouty Porcelain Princes? Priceless!!!

I have not yet seen anything but the most gently angelic smile from Schatzie, but then I have not yet been able to deny him anything he has asked for. Must do so tonight, in order to experience the PPP phenomenom.

(((Niphy))) Your post made me swoon!!

Cairi, Rosie, glad the wind blew on past you and you are both safe!!

Have exclamationmarkitis today!! Don't know why!!!

__________________
Walk to Rivendell - 170 / 458 miles

"I feel that as long as the Shire lies behind, safe and comfortable, I shall find wandering more bearable: I shall know that somewhere there is a firm foothold, even if my feet cannot stand there again."

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Sep 2002
Location: Perving on the Periannath with Peachy
Posts: 450

Niph, your mentioning all those credibility-straining things made me reflect again on clueless Nazgul. I often have thought that the forces of evil in ME needed to get their act together big-time. I mean, nine evil undead guys on horses can't seem to gang up effectively on a band of hobbits and one scruffy guy (Numenorean though he be) during a journey of several weeks across deserted country? I mean, one of them masterminds the assault on Minas Tirith, fergawdssakes.

And these guys supposedly have deadly Ring radar that attracts them to wherever it is, but they regularly pass it over (Marshes, Minas Morgul, Cirith Ungol) without, seemingly, even telling their boss they felt a funny kind of itch at such and such a place. And the Ring itself must have a lousy telecommunication system if it can't get a message off to its boss even inside Mordor. Sauron could have learned a lesson from the guy who invented the keychain that sets off a buzzer when you can't remember where you put down your keys.

And I think Manwe must have clued the Eagles in to flame-proofing. Didn't the Nazgul get all crispy and fall down and go boom, while the Eagles emerged A-OK?

So what. I love it!

quote:

---

I got spam-mail this morning from sam@total-and-complete-support. He's gone pro.

---

((((Peachy))))

__________________
Sweet Lady," quoth Seleta, "but he's hot."---Frodo Hill by Teasel

But they came at last to a glade open to the stars, and there Frodo stood and looked at them, and the light of Aman was in his face.... And the love of Frodo and the Harem was great, for as far as the Haremites were concerned, he was in the world the fairest of all the Children of Iluvatar that was or shall ever be. ---The Silmarillion as told by Peachy

But now I saw the bright shadow coming out of the book into the real world and resting there, transforming all common things and yet itself unchanged.
~ C. S. Lewis, posted by Eldalieva

And for a moment he lifted up the Phial and looked down at his master, and the light burned gently now with the soft radiance of the evening-star in summer, and in that light Frodo's face was fair of hue again, pale but beautiful with an elvish beauty, as of one who has long passed the shadows. --- The Two Towers

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Jan 2002
Location: In BEWTE, taking care of Frodo's pipes (someone's got to do it...)
Posts: 267

Okay, this is how far behind I am.

Narya--that picture of Frodo on the cover of the new "Fellowship"---

I was also trying to refrain from buying the new "movie" covers but now the reasoning for that has mysteriously escaped me.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Narya Celebrian

Just when you think you have mastered your swoon, the swoon masters you. Frodo, swoon-master extraordinaire.

---

THAT my dear, as soon as I am ever able, is to be added to my sigs.

Hewene--let me know if you would like me to send you some almond massage oil.

Peachy--hey, the pole and the disco ball was FRODO's idea. He said something about wanting to act out a piece of fanfic he read. Who am I to say no?

Ghyste--LOVE DDL. Love him.

quote:

---

Originally posted by quicksilver
You cant slip a scantily-clad DDL past me ! (Or Lily )

---

LOL!! Tis true, tis true.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cionaudha
Lily & Peachy: The Pure and Lofty Spirit Committee would like their stash of naughtyfic back. And the blacklight. The Committee supposes there's no use asking for the chocolate sauce.

---

Well now you're just being snippy.

Welcome Withywindle! Set yourself down and have some cheesecake and some tea. Has anyone signed you up in the appointment book yet?

Spork--thanks for the head's up about the book--I'll have to go take a look for it.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Meryl Marie
And the Harem Porn scene in the SE DVD ("Imagine you're back in your own bed, with a lovely feather pillow....") ...

Ah, Eru's in his heaven, all's right with the world. Ariel is perving again.

---

I thought the whole movie was the Harem Porn Scene?

And yes, you know the sun is going to rise tomorrow when Ariel is back in high swoonage.

I have to agree with Mirabella about the spoilers. I went into TTT with very little info, and I think I was the worse for it. I had no idea about Osgiliath...sigh...so imagine me sitting there in completely "wt...?" mode. I think I shall try to go in with a good balance for ROTK, though I think from what we've heard ROTK will be relatively closer to the books than TTT was.

Meryl--as soon as I get back, I am copying that pic with the verse. Stunning, stunning.

Ariel--I'll take the caught in a snowstorm, huddled with Frodo in front of the fire in a cozy back room of BEWTE version of your ficlet.

Actually, make it twenty versions of it. Or so.

How are all our pregnant Haremites doing? When are the due dates???

Patricia--HS!! I just picked up a stand-up of the four hobbits last week. Couldn't pass it up--it was only $25.00.

I will leave it up to Arryle to tell about her "adventure-ala-Bilbo" at a comic-book store last week. If she decides to tell.

{{{Quicksilver}}}

"Frosdick Grand" sounds like an ice cream bar to me.





Just saying.

Peachy!!! ROFL!!!! Love the Frodo Doll Diaries!!!!!! How did you get Teutsie's personality down so perfectly???? Of course he's a Libra, but he's still got quite a bit of Virgo in him. Such a perfectionist.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Spork

Embrace your inner gabby broad! Feed her cheesecake!! Let her swoon!! Show her pictures of UnbuttonedShirt!Frodo!!

---

Spork my dear, I think you had best write "The Care and Feeding of Haremites, Vol. I."

Lily bounces about because Orc-Armor Frodo is now available.

Cionaudha--love your entire post from the 14th.

__________________
"...a Sex God does, after all, have responsibilities"--Josan
"That Harem's done nothing but stare at you since we arrived."
"And it was just like a great dark wind within the wings of a storm...and I think I had met my match...he was singin'...and undoing...and undoing...the laces...undoing the laces..."
Do not tempt me Frodo! ...oh, who am I kidding, tempt me, tempt me!
"Baby Baby Baby when all your love is gone, who will save me from all I'm up against out in this world...and Maybe maybe maybe you'll find something that's enough to keep you, but if the bright lights don't recieve you, you should turn yourself around and come on home."
Rob Thomas. Do I really need to say more than that?

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Jan 2002
Location: a place like Middle Earth
Posts: 235

I agree with the believable tracking skill.. ...I can do that.. and found it totally believable...

I learned when I was much younger..

you can tell not only who was in a spot.. but I can tell you how long ago they were there..

first off the track about them laying on the ground could have shown their shape and size.. and that they were bound.. and also if they moved in the right way their foot print..

if they moved along you could see that they were moving .. and that their hands were tied..

and that the bonds were cut cause there was two hands being used.. that then the hobbits running that is obvious..... in fact as a person that has learned that skill I liked it

oh well that is just one womans opinion

oh. ........Hello Everyone

__________________
If of ships I now would sing
What ship would come to me
What ship would ever bear
me back across so wide a sea

Elen síla lúmenn' omentielvo, "a star shines upon the hour of our meeting"

What is named can be told, what is told can be taught, what is taught can be learned, what is learned can bring wisdom.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Sep 2002
Location: The Harem, home to hankering handmaids of one heavenly Hobbit
Posts: 806

quote:

---

Originally posted by Meryl Marie
And the Ring itself must have a lousy telecommunication system if it can't get a message off to its boss even inside Mordor. Sauron could have learned a lesson from the guy who invented the keychain that sets off a buzzer when you can't remember where you put down your keys.

---

I have one of those things, but the batteries run down *really* quickly, making it virtually useless. Maybe Sauron just needed better batteries....

quote:

---

Originally posted by Lily
Hewene--let me know if you would like me to send you some almond massage oil.

---

Oooo I'd love it! Can you send me someone to apply it, too?

Hey, fin!

Hewene

__________________
Why look, it's quiet, reserved Hewene! -- eldalieva

Member of the Fellowship of the Newbies TTT Count = 11 Walk to Rivendell = 28/458 miles

Sam: "We're lost. I don't think Gandalf meant for us to come this way."
Frodo: "He didn't mean for a lot of things to happen, Sam, but they did."

I don't care about character arc or dramatic tension or anything. I just want a naked Fro. - Anais

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Mar 2002
Location: If I can't be a grabby elf lady, I'll be a gabby broad!
Posts: 1350

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ghyste
I will indeed - in fact I got the DDL to arrange the present heatwave just to make sure I was properly acclimatised

---

Well then, he's a very naughty boy, to manipulate the weather like that.

I think I will have to devise a suitable punishment for our Diminuitive Dark Lord.

Where are me manacles???

Spork my dear, I think you had best write "The Care and Feeding of Haremites, Vol. I."

Oh my, Lily. PLOT BUNNY! There's a plot bunny loose in the house!

quote:

---

"Frodo Sleeping Peacefully in Lothlorien Whilst Silvery Blossoms Caress His Forehead" completely wrong. I don't think I need to explain which word it was, do I?

---

Thank you, Ghyste, for the delightful mental image that gives me.

Hey, finafyr! You're a real Ranger!

Niphy, that was AWESOME.

My word, girls, you're all on a roll. You're all being so witty and eloquent and, um, hormonally excitable it's difficult to know who to respond to.

AND WE ARE STILL FIVE MONTHS OFF ROTK, dagnabbit!

__________________
'Instead of a Dark Lord you will have a HOBBIT! Dark-curled, yes, as swirls of Galaxy ripple! Swoonier than the depths of the abyss! Hotter than the Cracks of Doom! All shall love me and turn to goo!' Niphredil

He has taken us down into what he once called "the back-kitchen" of the unconscious, where the dream kettle boils the brew of what we really care about. Preface to 'The Wind in the Willows'

History will attend to itself. It always does. Delenn.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Sep 2002
Location:
Posts: 44

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ghyste


Ferodo: I have a long-standing affection for Ferodo (whatever it is that they make). In the dim, distant past before the M25 when you had to drive through the City of London to get to the M1, I used to regularly travel under a bridge with "Ferodo" emblazoned on it in huge white letters, and muse about a certain hobbit. Fortunately for other road users, I was too young to drive at the time. I wonder if it's still there?

---

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Feb 2002
Location: Thrall of the Nutella Curls
Posts: 513

Pearl said: "Now where are me manacles?"

Erm - you mean the ones I borrowed, Pearl? Shall I detach them from the DDL first? Niph looks sheepish.

Ghyste - well you deserve those horns, m'dear! It IS a good thing you weren't driving in those days!

Niph writes lines:

I must not borrow Pearl's manacles without asking, even when Frodo tells me to.
I must not borrow Pearl's manacles without asking, even when Frodo tells me to.

it's difficult to know who to respond to.

Oh, I thinik you know QUITE well who to respond to, Missy. As do we all.

I mean, we are a HAREM, aren't we?

MERYL MARIE - wonderful post. Brilliance. Sheer brilliance. But of course, clueless Nazgul didn't really want to hurt Frodo - that must be the answer. They tried really, really hard - but they too were mesmerised by the Eyes.

I've come across Bagginis before, too.

Hmmm - Frodio Baggini, bambino of Drogio and Primatella Baggini. Adopted by his uncle, Mario Baggini, when his parents drowned. Fond of mushroom tortellini ...

Last edited by Niphredil on 07-16-2003 at 05:14 PM

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Apr 2002
Location: Tart headquarters
Posts: 660

You gals slay me,!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I could not track a herd of Oliphants across wet cement!
So now you have me (sort of) convinced that it can be done. I should have known better. Strider sniffs alot in FOTR, that has to be a sign of a good tracker.
Wants to see Fina and Cion on thier hands and knees following the trail of chocolate sauce....
````````````
Oh NARYA have you seen the Helm's deeps action figure set?...... the one with Haldir, the pretty elf? It is 30 bucks at my toys r us.
```````
Girl kid said my Frodoll is scary, boy kid says he is 'just not right'
Hus still has 'no comment'
Anyone want to adopt my kids, and huz I keep the doll???
```````````````
2 hours of yard work today, and my yard looks the same, huh.

peace from queenie

http://www.cafeshops.com/ggguys/125715

Beasty gave me this link^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

__________________
In place of a Dark Lord, you will have Moggy! ~oh yeah, loon comes with the deal~
```````````````````````````

FRODO LIVES........... with us
BEWTE

Last edited by queen2120 on 07-16-2003 at 06:15 PM

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Sep 2002
Location: Looking out to sea
Posts: 953

First off - on a personal note - I PASSED MY PIANO EXAM!!! WITH HONOURS!!! GO ME!!!

And to think I fretted about it for weeks.

Bought some Mike's Hard Lemonade to celebrate. Had to stop myself from calling it Frodo's Hard while I was still in the store...Y'all are a bad influence on me...

Queenie - !!! I've only seen those in the toy magazines!! How did it come to this? Geek boys make sure I see the new stuff coming out in the toy magazines... Lucky you - I don't think my local toys' r us will get them. I'll probably have to get them on e-bay - or find someone in the states who can ship them to me in exchange for real money... was that subtle???

I don't think Strider sniffs 'cause he's tracking - I think he's doing the 'does this smell too bad to wear again?' guy thing.

Manacles, shmanacles. Silk scarves work just as well, plus they have...well...multiple uses....

__________________
Walk to Rivendell - 170 / 458 miles

"I feel that as long as the Shire lies behind, safe and comfortable, I shall find wandering more bearable: I shall know that somewhere there is a firm foothold, even if my feet cannot stand there again."

Last edited by Narya Celebrian on 07-16-2003 at 06:26 PM

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: May 2002
Location: Stocking up on umbrellas in Washington DC
Posts: 622

Hi all

The stock people at Target in San Diego must have miscued somewhere, and they stocked the Frodo in Orc Armor action figure for normal sale. Aina from the Blue Place has acquired one.

quote:

---

From the blue place
I asked her:

Aina, you have the best view of the action figure details. Can you tell if Frodo has any remnants of his original clothing, such as a collar, or a sleeve on his elbow, or a vest or anything?

She answered:

The only thing I can see is the collar of his shirt and it's skin-colored as if the bastards didn't want people like us notice that he's wearing hobbit clothes under his orc armour.

........or because they didn't have enough paint?

---

__________________
FotR Tally: 18 TTT Tally: 7 RotK Tally: 0
-----------------
Your father loves you, Faramir, and will remember it ere the end. Farewell! --- The Return of the King
We had an afternoon tea at my office a week or two ago. You know, the sort where you are supposed to bond with your fellow w-orcers. --- estella rose
Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you -- Matt 5:44
Blessed be!

Last edited by erendis on 07-16-2003 at 08:25 PM

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Sep 2002
Location: Crazy Go Nuts University
Posts: 571

Queenie, that t-shirt is the FUNNIEST!

Lily, I can't take credit for that quote -- I adapted it from the movie "PCU": "Look out that window! That's not a protest! That is a cry for help! They're begging us.... Please have a party! Feed us drinks! Get us laid!! AAUUGGHH!!"

Spork jumps out of the way of the plot bunny before it can reach her
Somebody else catch it! Quick!!

GO NARYA!! I knew you could do it! This calls for a special night with the Squire!! See -- he's already preparing!

__________________
"I always trust my instincts. Even if they're wrong, because wrong things happen for a reason too." -- Alan Cumming, Tommy's Tale
"Constitution Museum Opening Marred When Visitors Discover Everything Bush Is Doing Is Illegal" -- Headline from "The Daily Probe"
"Some people will never know anything beyond what they see with their own eyes." -- Nightcrawler, "X2"
"I am INVINCIBLE!!" -- Boris Grishenko, "GoldenEye"
"If I could find a real life place to make me feel like Tiffany's, then I'd buy some furniture and give the cat a name." -- Holly Golightly, "Breakfast at Tiffany's
"I have done some touches to my nonsense fairy language -- to its improvement. I often long to work at it and don't let myself 'cause though I love it so it does seem such a mad hobby!" -- Tolkien, Letter #4

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: Jan 2003
Location: Horny, hellbound and happy in the Harem with Meryl Marie
Posts: 308

Frodio Baggini! Mama Mia, Frodio, caramia!

Meryl, Teutsie has refused to send me the addy for PPP. For some reason he doesn’t trust you with it. Even when I told him it was for research purposes only. Honestly, cannot believe what these dolls get up to.

The Very Secret Diary of Schatzie, continued.

Day 11.
Email from Elda. She ran bets on who Elevensies would go for first at the Hoot. Huh. I owe Elda six snogs.

Day 12.
Tee hee. Goldilocks - I mean HALFling - emailed re his hair. I suggested buzz cut. He’d do it if I was there making cocktails. HALFling will do anything after two margaritas.

Or anyone, come to think of it.

Day 13.
Practised making drinskies. Whee! Six Mai-Tais and no effect shoever. Blurrygoofun. Whoops. Fallen over.

Day 14.
Oooh. Shards of Morgulblades in head. Could really go for some chips. Will be sick if anyone mentions lembas.

Narya giving me Strange Looks and wondering about drinks cabinet. Will have to find recipe for making own ale.

Day 15.
Got email from Teutsie recommending strange websites. Had no idea Gandalf wore those under his robes. Kinky.

Oh, great. The Care Bears are sending me Tuff Teddies spam. Gits.

Teddy Ruxpin’s vocabulary has certainly expanded.

Day 16.
HALFling still obsessing about hair. “Look what it did for Marilyn Monroe”, he keeps saying. Methinks HALFling is missing the point. Hewene will kill him if he tries anything.

Found site for Dwarvish Ale on the Net. Amazing what Google will bring up.

Day 17.
Whoops, read that wrong. Is not Dwarvish Ale but Dwarvish ALE, the Dwarvish Association for Likable Elves. Knew Gimli was up to something.

Hang on. “Lickable” elves?!

The Nenya Nibble looks like good trick, however. Bet Narya will enjoy it.

Day 18.
Suggested HALFling go for the Matrix leather look. Will get pics of him for Pouty Porcelain Princes. He is definite contender for Pout of the Month. Must email Elda for the odds.

__________________
It's official - Peachy is definitely some new genetically engineered lifeform. ~ Ghyste.

Peachyness is a wonderful thing. ~ Arryle.

The soul of The Two Towers is in Frodo's anguished face. - Russell Swensen, LA Weekly.

O! Gil-Galad was a poncy king
Of him the jesters madly sing
The last whose realm had vodka free
Between the mountains and the sea... - Jussacgirl, LOTR Big Brother.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Registered: May 2003
Location: Breathlessly waiting to meet the Squire...perhaps by the hearth? ;)
Posts: 156

Hi I must have accidentally unsubscribed to *all* my KD threads rather than just one, because I haven't gotten *any* message notices for a couple of weeks now and suddenly realized that BETWE couldn't be *that* quiet....well I was right....I'm not even going to try to catch up but I would like to hear more about the Frodo in Orc Armor at Target story.....is the Target in San Diego the only one he's been spotted at?

My one LOTR shelf is full now....I have added a Boromir, TTT Legolas, Aragorn, Strider (different) and then received a Traveling Bilbo as a gift, plus my two Frodos and a Frodo/Bilbo ornament. So now I must come up with a new shelf for the ROTK figures...

And I must say...Orlando Bloom was not bad at all in Pirates of the Caribbean

__________________
"I can hardly believe it....There was an Orc with a whip, and then it turns into Sam!"

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged