It’s a Harem filk! Lily’s Bohemian Rhapsody, for Lily who had a dream…
Lily:
I can't believe it
what a strange fantasy
I was with Legolas
in another reality
I looked in his eyes
and I was surprised to see
he was a honey, I was in ecstasy
It isn't like me to, forget Fro
I was hot for his bow
But it was a dream and it doesn't really matter to me, to me
Crazy, it was really strange,
I was Legolas's chick and it nearly made me sick
Frodo, I was so amazed
I'm awfully glad to find it wasn't true
Frodo, ooo, didn't mean to leave you out
I could rebook a night with you tomorrow
get it on, get it on, it's a dream, it doesn't matter..
Harem:
Lily, your time has come
He sends shivers down your spine
You do hairbraids all the time
Goodbye to our Lily - she's got to go
Gotta leave us all behind and face the truth
Frodo:
Lily, ooo - (I'll miss your backrubs)
I am gonna cry
I can't believe you didn't mean it all
Harem:
She's got a point though, Lily's so Elvish
she should go, she should go, you know Lily, you can go
Dreams like that are frightening but also most enlightening, see?
Lily:
That's not so, that's not so,
that's not so, that's not so
That's not so, I love Frodo
Frodo:
She is a hobbit lass, she really loves me
She is a hobbit lass from a good family
Spare her a life in a Sindarin's tree
Harem:
Easy come easy go - she's got it bad for Lego
Lily:
That's rubbish!
Harem:
No, we think that it is so
Lily:
How could you!
Harem:
We will keep your linden soap, linden soap
Lily:
You wenches!
Harem:
Never trust a blonde, Frodo you've been conned
Lily:
I won't go, never!
Never gonna go - never go
Never gonna go - ooo
No, no, no, no, no, no!
Frodo:
Are you clear? Cause it's queer
Harem:
No way mate!
Frodo:
Not our Lily, this is silly
Harem:
We're dead straight
Lily:
The Haremites have all got it in for me, for me, for meeeeee
So you think you can turf me to some Elvish guy?
So you think you can make me tell Frodo goodbye?
Oh Frodo - this is so stupid Frodo
I'm not gonna get out - not gonna get right outta here
Harem:
Ooh yeah, ooh yeah
We're here for you Frodo
we don't dream of Elves
we just want to keep you to ourselves
(Pity we couldn't nick the soap...)